Tuesday, April 12, 2011
We Have Contact!
Just so everyone is in the loop: I have officially made contact with our biological family in San Francisco. Specifically, I was able to speak with the daughter of Ben Garcia Sr. and his first wife (Connie). She is a very nice woman by the name of Geri Garcia (no not that Jerry Garcia) and has two daughters that I also spoke with. They were VERY excited to hear from me and surprisingly Mrs. Garcia knew quite a bit about the adoption of the kids from our side. She is in her 70's and said she had been trying to find out what happened to our side but couldn't find any information on what happened to the kids after losing contact. She remembered Glenna as a "very sweet woman" and understood the medical problems she had, resulting in having to give the kids up. She even remembered that Ben and Glenna lived on Hayes Street in SF. I will continue to post updates as I learn more.
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18 comments:
This is wonderful Randy. I'll be really interested in what she has to contribute.
HEY, I got contacted via 23andme a relative where our connection appears near the beginning of mom's side. The name is Potter. It's not nailed down who it is as yet, but the name is Potter. That's the name Randy provided from his searches of Ancestry.com
I got in contact with Michelle last night. She gave me Geri's Phone number. I am going to try to call her in the next day or so.
They live pretty close by so i may wonder over the border to meet her. If the price of gas goes down.
Although she is not related to me, its nice to meet another of the Garcia's that might know a little more about the family. And "may" know who my father is
Dick.
Good sleuthing, Randy. It's a good thing that you followed up on your hunches. More of the pieces of our familial history will be falling into place.
We have been contacting each other on face book, I have met her, and she's a nice lady, most of the family are on facebook, so there has been a lot of action, in this area. I look forward to meeting with her, when we connect and Lisi, is so happy. We are going to call her Friday, so Lisi can talk to her.
This is exciting. Finally we will ahve parts of the puzzles falling into place. Im curious about if Ben & Glenna were actually married, I understood they weren't and now with this other family, before and after us .. makes me wonder. One of our neices said, they grew up with Benny, our father ... but hopefully we'll get these answers. This is just one of many for me.
I too would like to see this cleared up. When mom left Benny, I don't remember her writing in her letters that she 'wanted a divorce'. She might have, but I don't remember it.
i was going to ask her today, but i forgot. had other things to talk about.
Dick
I am so confused, Isn't Jeri our older sister. Are Connie and Jeri the same person???
This is according to Geri:
Connie was the first wife of Ben. Connie and Ben had two children together: Geri and Ben. Geri is the oldest and was born in 1938. I think her brother Ben was born about 1940 and he died in 2007. Connie and Ben divorced before Ben and Glenna got together.
Geri said she thinks that Glenna and Ben were not legally married, although she said it is possible. She did say that Glenna immediately fell in love with Ben.
Ben had a third wife, Nellie, but it does not appear that they had any children together.
I thought karen had moms wedding ring. really dosnt mean anything..
Dick
Actually, Mom gave Karen our great grandma, Hattie, 'engagement ring', just before she died. It meant a lot to Karen, who really loved mom. We passed it on to Peter Jr, he presented it to Karissa when he proposed to her.
im keeping my mouth shut from now on.
Dick
What if you get hungry?
from my understanding, when I talked to Glenna, about Dick, the father was in the navy, and Ben was willing to give him, his name, on the hospital records, that is why I was given legal rights to sign, any concerns with and about Dick, so that his wishes were met. We had a long talk at that time, and I did have the fathers name, but from what I understood, he was married, in the service in the department of the navy.
From what I do understand, the only person she married, was her husband, when she died.
She had no legal rights to the house, they lived in, as it was his place. I don't think she was ever married to him, he was just willing to list us as his children.
That was why I was interested in knowing if we were brother and sisters, Jim, Chuck, Lisi, me, Suzy and Bonnie, from my understanding, Chuck found out he was not adopted, when he went into the service, and Helen said, they were to old to adopte.
Glenna, told me, "that it was so hard on her, when she did the papers on, us..... Bonnie, Lisi, me and Suzy, she could not bring herself to sign any other adoptions...", as I tried to talk her into letting Jack and Betty, adopt Dick, so they could sign the needed, papers. But, as they had told Dick to leave, and Jess and I took him in, she would only allow me to take, care of these needs, and I did have the letter she sent, with all that was needed, on this matter.
I am aware that Betty has the adoption papers on Bonnie and as they used dad's lawyer, it's the same person, that did our adoption. Also, that was why there were bad feelings between Betty and June Lange. As they wished to adopt Suzy. Suzy had gone to live with someone else before, she was adopted to the Langes.
I have wondered on Suzy and Bonnie and why I would like to see if the
Not being married to him, would have given her that right, we did talk a lot while Dick was living with the Langes, as she'd call me, after mom died. But, in part, I said he was happy, and also he had a brother to play with. She did not talk to our mom, June, as I take it there were some bad feelings there, as the agreement was we were to have contact with our brothers and sister's but that was limited by mom, not dad... so she was unable to connect as after we were adopted, her rights were removed, and mom, made sure she never contacted us, this did not take place tell I left home, and she was so glad to hear all were ok. She, did not wish to loose contact, with her children, as it was forced by the state, as she was so ill, and unable to care for us.
They let her keep Peter, but we would have all gone to the State, otherwise, so she had a friend that got in contact with Helen and Pete, and they were the ones to have us put, in the different families, and with the agreement, of being able to know our brothers and sisters.
She was so ill, and loved us all so much,... The families that took us in, gave the names to the kids, as so many do now day's, within our own group,... So, my understanding, the only person's, she did marry was Rouzaud, and her last husband...... all between, we are all bastard children, laugh!!!!
She did talk about her time, with Ben and his drinking and how he was with us, ... it was not good, ok. One reason so many of us have nightmares,... I will not go into that. Past is past, I did ask her some questions, about stuff and she did give me some answers.
I tried to get what I needed, for I wished to have history, as much as I could. From her husband, he told me, that it would upset her so much, he did not wish to have me talk to her about it, from what she went threw and lived. I know she tried to keep a roof over our heads and protect us.
So, in words, only Peter, Glenda, are true sisters and brothers... I have always felt, maybe, Bonnie and Suzy may been from another man.
I am aware some was removed in what I was writing, about, Dick, as he came to visit, and I do remember the trip going to go down to see him, and bringing him back for a visit..... and what took place during that time. Glenna, talked to mom, on the phone, wanting him to be returned, but Dick did not wish to go back, and wanted to stay, as he had Doug to play with and all the fun, he did not have with his mom, and in CA.
Just be aware as I write, I am thinking back to the times I am with Glenna, on the phone and what she talked to me about. It was sad, and I was aware how much she did love all her children, and the hard place she was at in life.
As mothers, and care provider, it's hard not to understand, the pain of the mother's, also in this time and age. Men will never understand, and it upsets me, when the men, do not help in the support of children. Also, that it is so easy to make a baby and then just walk away from the mom and child.
Maybe that is why I fight for the right of the person, for so many, wish to remove the wishes they wish in their life, to their understanding... that is how it is with children, in this day and age.
I was brought up to stand up for my mom and dad's rights,... not as I wished but how they wished it. They don't say,,,.. it is what my mom or dad wish, so it should be that way,.. phone calls to locations don't cut it, as I am aware what takes place in hositals and such. Also working within the system protecting those, that are not seen to, even at the times of others, with the doctors, as they are also aware how it is in the systems.
I like the way they train, the care providers, as how it is,... when you go in for training, in care.
I will write up what I know from my times talking to Glenna and my dad, but also wish to, back it up, in paperwork... if I can.
Uncle Jess is getting better all the time, though he still has a lot of pain.
love to all...... Lili
To all concerned. This genetic (spit) test that Jim and Randy have promoted, shows, so far, that we are indeed siblings. I know Suzie and Bonnie were very homely when younger, but they've gotten attractive as they've aged.
Your so funny Peter Pan. But for once you are right, Suzy and I get better and wiser with age.
It's pretty hard to argue with objective information. If there are any questions as to our parentage and the relationship of each of us, getting the test done should answer those questions. Randy, through his interest in 23andMe, has opened up our family history as well as our family health. The question is, to all of us, what will we choose to do with it?
Jim
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